Hello all,
Sorry for the delay in posts, we are quickly finding out that the adoption process takes up a lot of your time... time you would normally be spending doing things like, oh I don't know, writing a blog, or maybe eating a sandwich. I have just a few moments before I am off to class tonight, but I wanted to touch base with you guys and let you know what has happened since orientation.
Jessie and I have started our PS-MAPP training, which is a 6 week course that we go to every Monday and Wednesday night from 6-9pm. We have been to five sessions so far and find them incredibly informative and enjoyable. These classes are used as an information and selection process, and are not only providing us with all of the tools we will need to become prepared and effective parents, but it is giving our social worker the opportunity to sit with us twice a week and see first-hand how we deal with a full spectrum of emotions. Along with our social worker, we are also trained by a fellow resource parent who has been through this process before, and also a college rep who is incredibly knowledgeable on the process and what is expected of us.
Our first class, which was on April 6th, did not start out as a stress free experience. We had received our pre-registration e-mail the day before class started that stressed, in bold lettering, that simply registering for the class did not guarantee placement. The facilitators needed at least 20 people in attendance but no more than 25 to hold a class. The letter also stated that there would most likely be a line and that only the first 25 people in the line who had correctly pre-registered would be allowed admittance and registration started at promptly 5:30. Well, as you can imagine, Jessie and I took this very seriously. We know how much we want this dream to become a reality, so we figured that it would be a mad frenzy to get a spot before the class was full. This created a bit of stress for me considering that A: I work in Santa Ana, B: Traffic on the 405 is extremely unpredictable, and C: the letter almost made it sound like we should have been camped out the night before.
Somehow Jessie and I managed to get past any hurtles we had imagined would have made us late and arrived at the school at 4pm. To our great surprise, and relief, we were the first ones there. Now, with two hours to wait, we started to realize that we had made for a very long afternoon. Luckliy there was a small cafe close by which served rather tasty chinese food and we snacked on that while waiting for other prospective parents to show. At around 5pm a group of men started setting up in the conference room that had been designated for our classes. Once confirming with these men that they were not there for PS-MAPP (they were setting up for a police academy training), a new wave of panic set in. Was there a way that we had been waiting outside of the wrong conference room? Was there a huge line of parents waiting outside another door, claiming our spots in this coveted class as we sat there twiddling our thumbs? OH THE STRESS!!! Luckily for us, I still had the number of the woman who registered us for the class, so I called her to make sure that we had the location correct. She confirmed that we were in the right place and that the room had been double booked which apparently happens often. Soon enough the trainers arrived and pre-registration started... however at this point, there were only 7 people waiting including Jessie and me. As we sat there discussing how this day was already stressful enough without the class being cancelled and us having to start this entire process over again, a few more people staggered in, bringing out head cout to 11. Not until 6:03 did the 20th person sign their name on the sign-in sheet and Jessie and I gave a mutual sign of relief.
Since the first class, which had a final total of 21 prospective parents, our numbers have dwindles to just 14. This class is effectively executed and makes you really soul search to find if this process is right for you. Jessie and I, as I'm sure is no surprise to any of our friends and family reading this, are still VERY sure that this is exactly how we want to start our family, but I must admit that we have had several serious conversations about what exactly we can handle, what our true expectations are, and how we feel that this will change us forever. I affectionately call the MAPP classes "parenting boot camp" but only because they are an extremely emotional journey that force you to evaluate who you are and how you can help a child. I just wish everyone who got pregnant had to take these classes. If they did I bet there would be far fewer children in the system waiting for adoptive homes.
Our next leg of this journey is the homestudy, which will be starting shortly since Jess and I have already submitted both the state and county applications. We'll talk about the joys of preparing the house and the challenges of making sure everything we own is locked away, padded, or flame retardent. Thanks for reading and we'll try to be better about keeping you guys updated.
Monday, April 13, 2009
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Orientation
On Thursday, March 26th, Jen and I went to Cerritos College to attend the Fost-Adopt orientation. We arrived about forty minutes early, so we had lunch in the cafeteria. We went into the classroom about fifteen minutes early, and were surprised to see that most of the chairs had already been filled. We were lucky to find the last two chairs sitting together at a table.
Once seated, the LA County Department of Family & Children Services worker greeted us and had us sign in. This was important because they used the sign-in sheets to generate the certificate that signified the completion of the orientation, which in turn is needed to attend the PS-MAPP classes (more on that later). When 12:00 hit, there were approximately thirty people that had come for orientation, which, according to the social worker, was a large class. The first half of the orientation was by LA County Department of Family & Children Services (DFCS), and the second half was by the California Department of Social Services (CDSS), Community Care Licensing division (CCL).
German (pronounced Her-mahn) was the social worker for LA County, and was extremely professional, informative, and friendly. He talked us through and hour and a half’s worth of exactly how the LA County DFCS works, how and when children are taken from their homes and placed in foster care, how they work with families to make the child’s home safe so that they can return to their family, and how they know that it’s time to terminate the parental rights, making the child eligible for adoption. He gave us statistics, such as last month (February 2009), DFCS worked with 33,000 children. This is all just in LA County only! At any given time, there are 500-800 children eligible for adoption. That just shows how well the county works with the families to get them into shape and equipped for raising their own children correctly. German also gave us the steps for how to become a “Resource Family” to foster these kids. The fastest he’s ever seen someone become licensed and ready to foster was two months. Jen and I hope to fall into the 2-4 month range.
The first step in the Resource Family process is the orientation. Check. The second step, countywise, is to take the county-run PS-MAPP classes. PS-MAPP stands for Permanence and Safety – Model Approach to Partnerships in Parenting, which in plain English, is parenting classes. It’s a 33-hour, 6-week course that deals with the basics of parenting and how to deal with behavior/emotional/medical/adjustment problems that foster parents face when taking in a child. We are excited to take these classes and absorb everything they teach us. The trick is getting into a class. In order for the class to commence, a minimum of twenty people need to be signed up, but no more than twenty-five can be admitted. It’s on a first-come, first-serve basis, so we must make sure that we’re super early to the first meeting, and not to forget our orientation completion certificate! Jen and I signed up for the Monday/Wednesday 6-9pm classes at El Camino College in Torrance, which start on April 6th. Hopefully enough people will sign up so that class can start. German told us that that’s not usually a problem.
Congruent to the PS-MAPP classes there are things that we must do for the state in order to get our license. First, we have to fill out the foster family application, which in actuality are several applications in one. The second half of the orientation was run by LaSherrie from the CDSS. She went through what the application looks like, how to fill it out correctly, and where to send it in. All this information is also available on their website: www.ccld.ca.gov. Along with filling out and sending in our application, we have to get a Live Scan background check done, get certified in first aid and CPR, have a physical done, and ready our home for the home study. This includes baby-proofing, setting up the bedroom to accommodate a child (or children), and making sure that everything is up to their safety standards. We must find out all the emergency shut-off for the gas, water & electricity, and get the numbers for the utilities and police. It sounds like a lot when they’re listing all this off, but it’s really not. Plus it’s stuff that should be done anyway.
Tonight we start filling out our application. We will attend CPR and first aid training at the YMCA in late April. The ball has begun rolling!
Once seated, the LA County Department of Family & Children Services worker greeted us and had us sign in. This was important because they used the sign-in sheets to generate the certificate that signified the completion of the orientation, which in turn is needed to attend the PS-MAPP classes (more on that later). When 12:00 hit, there were approximately thirty people that had come for orientation, which, according to the social worker, was a large class. The first half of the orientation was by LA County Department of Family & Children Services (DFCS), and the second half was by the California Department of Social Services (CDSS), Community Care Licensing division (CCL).
German (pronounced Her-mahn) was the social worker for LA County, and was extremely professional, informative, and friendly. He talked us through and hour and a half’s worth of exactly how the LA County DFCS works, how and when children are taken from their homes and placed in foster care, how they work with families to make the child’s home safe so that they can return to their family, and how they know that it’s time to terminate the parental rights, making the child eligible for adoption. He gave us statistics, such as last month (February 2009), DFCS worked with 33,000 children. This is all just in LA County only! At any given time, there are 500-800 children eligible for adoption. That just shows how well the county works with the families to get them into shape and equipped for raising their own children correctly. German also gave us the steps for how to become a “Resource Family” to foster these kids. The fastest he’s ever seen someone become licensed and ready to foster was two months. Jen and I hope to fall into the 2-4 month range.
The first step in the Resource Family process is the orientation. Check. The second step, countywise, is to take the county-run PS-MAPP classes. PS-MAPP stands for Permanence and Safety – Model Approach to Partnerships in Parenting, which in plain English, is parenting classes. It’s a 33-hour, 6-week course that deals with the basics of parenting and how to deal with behavior/emotional/medical/adjustment problems that foster parents face when taking in a child. We are excited to take these classes and absorb everything they teach us. The trick is getting into a class. In order for the class to commence, a minimum of twenty people need to be signed up, but no more than twenty-five can be admitted. It’s on a first-come, first-serve basis, so we must make sure that we’re super early to the first meeting, and not to forget our orientation completion certificate! Jen and I signed up for the Monday/Wednesday 6-9pm classes at El Camino College in Torrance, which start on April 6th. Hopefully enough people will sign up so that class can start. German told us that that’s not usually a problem.
Congruent to the PS-MAPP classes there are things that we must do for the state in order to get our license. First, we have to fill out the foster family application, which in actuality are several applications in one. The second half of the orientation was run by LaSherrie from the CDSS. She went through what the application looks like, how to fill it out correctly, and where to send it in. All this information is also available on their website: www.ccld.ca.gov. Along with filling out and sending in our application, we have to get a Live Scan background check done, get certified in first aid and CPR, have a physical done, and ready our home for the home study. This includes baby-proofing, setting up the bedroom to accommodate a child (or children), and making sure that everything is up to their safety standards. We must find out all the emergency shut-off for the gas, water & electricity, and get the numbers for the utilities and police. It sounds like a lot when they’re listing all this off, but it’s really not. Plus it’s stuff that should be done anyway.
Tonight we start filling out our application. We will attend CPR and first aid training at the YMCA in late April. The ball has begun rolling!
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
It begins!... The amazing journey we are embarking on.
Hello all and welcome to our blog. Jessie and I had this idea a few months ago to start a blog about out lives together. Very quickly however, we realized that as much as we love each other... our life is VERY boring. Well, all of this is about to change. You see, Jessie and I have decided that we are ready to expand our family beyond the current status of two kooky women and three overly pampered felines. Now I'm sure you're wondering exactly how we are going to achieve this goal since unlike hetero couples, there are no "pleasant surprises". Jess and I have discussed this at length, and length... and length. We have considered using a donor, both known and unknown, and have discussed adoption of every kind. Recently, through conversations and independent soul searching we have come to a mutual agreement that adoption is where our hearts truly are. Biological children are a blessing, and neither of us are nixing that option all together (we have YEARS before we're no longer able to biologically parent), but with this world already having so many wonderful children who are in need of homes and loving families, this is our perfect fit.
Adoption in itself can be a very daunting process, filled with an entire spectrum of emotion, along with mountains of paperwork and interviews. Luckily, together Jessie and I can conquer anything and we are both committed to do whatever it takes to fulfill our dream of parenthood. We have been in the extensive research phase for about a week now, and today we took our first leap. We have officially registered with the Department of Children and Family Services, with the intent to enter the Fost-Adopt program. On March 26th we will attend a three hour orientation with other hopeful applicants where we will learn the step-by-step process of fostering and adoption and submit our application.
Adoption in itself can be a very daunting process, filled with an entire spectrum of emotion, along with mountains of paperwork and interviews. Luckily, together Jessie and I can conquer anything and we are both committed to do whatever it takes to fulfill our dream of parenthood. We have been in the extensive research phase for about a week now, and today we took our first leap. We have officially registered with the Department of Children and Family Services, with the intent to enter the Fost-Adopt program. On March 26th we will attend a three hour orientation with other hopeful applicants where we will learn the step-by-step process of fostering and adoption and submit our application.
Now, the internet is an endless wealth of information, both factual and confusing. Jessie and I have found that all the research in the world still lead us down a muddled road with dead-ends abound. Fost-Adopt, though a wonderful program, is not that easy to find on the web. Luck however is in our favor. In June of '07 Jess and I were married by a man named George who has traveled the Fost-Adopt road successfully twice and is now, along with his partner, the proud father of two beautiful children. We sent him an e-mail a few days ago and he was more than happy to share in his knowledge of the beginning steps. Furthermore, this man is so warm-hearted that he has volunteered to meet with us at any time to discuss our next steps if we ever feel lost in our journey. Since Jessie and I are new to this, and are finding quickly that this helping hand is welcome, we are extending the same to anyone out there who has also decided to take this route. The following links are those that George gave us, both of which have been very helpful in answering some starting questions and guiding us toward the right numbers to call and people to talk to. We'll blog again as soon as we have reached the next step. Thanks for reading.
LA County Adoption FAQ's
Adoption Handbook: Very Useful Source of Information
The phone number for LA County to register for an orientation is 888-811-1121.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
